Timbits2Toonies

Today in 1991, StatsCan reported that 10.2% of us were on pogey and looking for work. Cows that graze on lespedeza give considerably less milk.  Gallup conducts polls in 160 nations—98% of the world’s population. Invented in France, the first bicycle rolled out the door in 1791. I have some puns about unemployment but none of them work.  28% of us play keyboard instruments, the nation’s most popular. A strawberry typically has around 200 seeds. Frozen carbon dioxide, a.k.a. dry ice, can’t melt.  Today in 1913, Albania became a sovereign nation.  Prodigy: A child who plays piano when he ought to be in bed. We address the mayor as Your Worship to show honour to our duly-elected First Citizen. Ground clearance on a WWII Jeep is 222.25 millimetres. Composed of densely packed hexagonal prismatic cells, bees live in honeycombs. Today in 1975, the European Space Agency was established. Bees designated to protect the queen of the hive are calle

This is Veterans’ Day in Sweden. Moose have been clocked swimming at 9.5 kph.  India ink is composed of soot and water. Former Prime Minister Jean Chretièn is an accomplished trombone player. I sink, therefore I swam. The golf tee was patented in 1899 by Dr. George Grant, son of slaves, freed by Lincoln. Meaning ‘to mislead’, the expression ‘red herring’ entered the lexicon in 1807. Today in 1953, Edmund Hillary and Tenzig Norgay were first to reach the top of Mt. Everest. The CAA boasts more than 6.2 million members.  My neighbour skidded, flipped his car-was found in a field by stray cows-they didn't call 911. Iceland’s unicameral Althing , currently has  63 Members of Parliament.  Today in 1968,  Presbyterians ordained Shirley Jeffery. She served in London, ON. Grease is a semisolid lubricant, composed of soap, emulsified with mineral or vegetable oil. The population of the Kingdom of Morocco is 34,740,000. When politicians see the

Chutney comes from the Hindi word चटनी chaṭnī , meaning to lick.   The five Studebaker brothers built their first wagon in 1852. The art of stained glass has been around for more than 2,000 years. Archeologists found a 5,000-year old settlement in Newfoundland; identified as Tim Hortons. The first crochet hooks were made of hardened mud.  The average life of a dog is ten to 14 years.  Today in 1934, the Dionne Quintuplets were born in Corbel, Ontario.  Great Lakes ships carry—in order of tonnage—iron ore, limestone, coal, cement and salt.  For amusement, my neighbour goes to Tim Hortons, smacks doughnuts out of people’s hands and shouts, “Not gluten free!” Today in 1888, the nation’s first electric railway opened in Windsor, Ontario. Diastolic pressure is the measure of the heart’s relaxation between beats. At 10 tonnes per hectare, Ireland boasts the most productive wheat farms.  To date, there have been 39 confirmed cases of measles, Canadawid

Tonight in 1949, J.R. Smallwood became Premier in Newfoundland's first provincial election. Washington Irving wrote, ‘It was a dark and stormy night’. He also coined, ‘the almighty dollar’ and ‘the great unwashed’. Residue is what is left after combustion or evaporation. Each and every squash contains 20 pairs of chromosomes. It was the best of Tim Hortons; it was the worst of Tim Hortons. Perfect love is the combination of attachment, caring and intimacy.  Today in 1873, PE Islanders voted to join Confederation. At 85,000 tonnes, France is Europe’s leading mustard maker, exporting 65%. The name Franklin comes from the archaic noun to describe a well-to-do farmer, landowner. PM Macdonald often slyly signed guest books as John A. Macdonald, cabinet maker. Raw elderberries are poisonous to humans.  Zombies come from Haitian folklore; the dead are reanimated through magic. It took six years to write the seven-book series, The Chronicles of N

Happiness ranges from contentment to intense joy.  Since 1966, today is Independence Day in Guyana, after 152 years of British colonial rule.  Folks in la belle province are the nation’s largest consumers of horse meat. A standard-sized credit card measures 85.60 by 53.98 millimetres.  Horses are happy thanks to their stable environments. While humans see three basic colours, an eagle sees five. There is no magic until there is an audience. As observed throughout the 50 United States, this is National Paper Airplane Day. O, I don’t want no more of army life, Gee Ma, I wanna go back to Ontario, Gee Ma, I wanna go ho-o-me, has been sung by homesick soldiers since 1940.  In the 16th Century, Hick was a pet name for Richard. The first salad bar was introduced to diners in 1950. A horse’s height is measured in hands. Today in 1874, Parliament passed the Dominion Elections Act, allowing secret ballot voting. My neighbour must be a hick; he swear

Today in 1980 Terry Fox reached PEI—day 44 of his cross-country Marathon of Hope. The word sudoko translates into English as ‘the digits must remain single’. The bladder can store half a litre of urine comfortably for two to five hours. Atlantic City boasts the world’s largest organ; it boasts 33,114 pipes and weighs 150 tonnes. Dark humour : To kill a one-legged fox,  make him run halfway across Canada. Fez was the capital of the Kingdom of Morocco until 1927. Laughter stimulates the organs, improves the immune system and relieves pain. Today in 1521, Martin Luther was declared to be an enemy of the Holy Roman Empire. Children in Ontario may acquire a snowmobile license at the age of 12. A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused. For 1957, Chrysler Canada billed its entire corporate lineup as ’The Forward Look’. 1958 saw the introduction of the Hula Hoop and the skateboard. 39 million people around the globe ar

The wind cannot make a sound until it blows against an object. Today in 1949, the Federal Republic of Germany was born. A dog’s sense of smell is 10,000 times more acute than that of its human owner.  Canadair builds aircraft in here at home, the US, the UK, Morocco and Mexico. To stop the wind from blowing away your newspaper, use a news anchor. The Amur leopard is Earth’s most endangered animal; fewer than 70 remain. Duct tape must be replaced every 12 months.  Today in 1873, Parliament created the RCMP. Urban geographers  know that avenues are required to run perpendicular to streets.  My neighbour took the road out of town; the Mounties made him put it back.  In 1893, the Newfoundland legislature forbade fishermen from killing seals on Sunday. Many mammals eat their newborn babies, if they are deformed. Refugees love our warmth, inclusiveness, world-class education and universal healthcare. A turtleneck shirt symbolized anti-establishment

The Vancouver Sun reports that 86,000 of us live with spinal cord injuries. Those who read crystal balls are called scryers.  Today in 1987, Rick Hansen ended his Man in Motion tour--40 000 km in 34 countries.  The length of airways in the two lungs is 2 400 kilometres. Fortune tellers look forward to dancing at the annual crystal ball.  The population of Spain is 46,659, 302. The surname Nash is topographic, derived from living near an ash tree. Ventriloquism was originally a religious practice.  The NHL awarded a franchise to the Vancouver Canucks today in 1970. King Carlos I was homely, proof that the reign in Spain falls mainly to the plain.   The Time Out Chair—as behavioural modification—was introduced in 1958. Wasabi root is 11% fat and 46% carbs. Indian mathematicians defined zero in AD 628. Today in 1820, Lord Dalhousie laid the cornerstone of Dalhousie University.  The number zero was invented to count the number of $100 bills

France is Europe’s largest producer of hemp.  Red blood cells can live in the human body for up to 120 days. Today in 2003, Mad Cow Disease was discovered on a farm in Alberta. 7% of Brits are vegan. Should the Royal bodyguards lose track of The Duke of Wales, they follow his foot prince. Currency used in the Republic of Cyprus is the Euro. From St. John’s to Victoria, more than 200,000 of us cycle to work on a regular basis.  Sakura cheese is creamy and flavoured with mountain cherry leaves. Stress changes the size of the human brain. Stress cannot exist in the presence of pie. Cats say ‘meow’ in English and ‘miaou’ in French but in Korean the cat says ‘yaong’. Canada boasts 44 symphony orchestras. A member of the primrose family, the scarlet pimpernel closes its flowers in foul weather. A 12.7 kilo box of kitty litter costs $16.99 at PetValu. My neighbour paid a $300 fine for owning an unspayed cat. The charge was kitty littering.