Timbits2Toonies

Today in 1642 AD, the City of Ville-Marie (Montréal) was founded. Paper is the traditional gift given to couples on their their first anniversary. The British military issues antimicrobial underwear that can be worn for 90 days at a time. Lions fear giraffes, hippos and elephants. I wanted to share a joke about paper but it was tearable.  Today in 1893, women in New Zealand were given the right to vote. X-ray machines were once a popular way to remove unwanted body hair.  The game Musical Chairs was first played in 1877. 60 milliltres of maple syrup contains 100% of the daily allowance of manganese. Heard a great local  band called the Blank Cheques but they're still unsigned. Eyeballs can get sunburnt.  Newfoundland has 6 million hectares of forest; Labrador has an additional 5.2 million. Porsche and Volkswagen merged in 2011. Official Texas chilli does not include beans. It takes forever to get reservations at the library, t...

There 12 700 firefighting Kiwis. The act of dividing something in squares is called graticulation.  A pig’s snout is called a grunt. We spend far more on pet food than baby food. When Notre Dame burst into flames, firefighters shouted, “Holy Smoke!”   Myrmecologists devote their lives to the study of ants.  Nunavut boasts 25 hamlets and one city. Newborn baby seahorses are called colts. 73% of Australia's trees are eucalyptus.   If my neighbour drinks any more coffee, I shall ground him.  The Anglican Church of Canada began to ordain women in 1973.  Ants stretch when they wake up in the morning. Groceries are the traditional gift for a 44th wedding anniversary.  Fidel Castro was school athlete of the year in 1944; he was a left-handed pitcher. A 100-year old ant is called an antique. The Cambodian alphabet has 74 letters. Men get the hiccups more frequently than women. Today in 1910 Parliament c...

Porsche built tanks for the Wermacht during World War Two.  Today in 1967, Toronto's Caribbean community celebrated the first Caribana. The A830 Airbus can seat 853 passengers.  Revolts take place to overthrow oppressors; the rebellious want concessions from overlords.   Cross an airplane with a psychic--the result is a flying sorcerer.  New Brunswick boasts four artisanal cheesemakers.  The word stucco  means plaster in Italian. Only male crickets can chirp.  On this date in 1930, Uruguay won the first FIFA World Cup. A cannibal's favourite cheese is limb-burger. Today in 1975, Petro-Canada was created by an act of Parliament. Shakespeare penned, 'Brevity is the soul of wit'.  A group of foxes is called an 'earth'.  Louis Comfort Tiffany began to produce stained glass windows in 1878. My neighbour would go to the four corners of Earth to prove the world is not flat. The RMS Queen Mary sailed across t...

This is Independence Day in São Tomé & Principe, cutting ties with Portugal in 1975. 66% of the world's 130 million bicycles are produced in China. The majority of disposable earplugs are made of memory foam. Anne of Green Gables has been required reading in Japanese schools since 1952. Catholic astronauts in outer space can't take part in Communion--there is no mass. It's war. Today in 1812, American troops invaded us, capturing Sandwich (Windsor, ON). A freshly cut cucumber not only doubles as shoe polish but makes footwear waterproof. At more than 140,000 a year, Chinese are by far, the most to seek asylum in the US.  The optimal temperature for sleep is between 15°C and 19C. My neighbour was up all night. He couldn't remember if he had insomnia or amnesia. Spruce is a good source of Vitamin C. At this very moment, 20,000 teddy bears are being auctioned on eBay.  The Governor General appoints the 105 Senators who sit in the Red ...

Today in 1770, Captain James Cook and crew docked in Botany Bay, Australia. Tin does not corrode in water. The western end of Northumberland Strait has only one tide a day. Ford is the world’s largest family-owned business. The new speed limit is 60kph—Fords, just do the best you can. The world’s first teddy bear museum opened in England in 1984. Mondays, crew on the HMS Endeavour ate 8  oz. of butter, 10 oz. of cheese and all the porridge or boiled wheat they wanted. Today in 1903, a 30 million cubic-metre landslide killed 70 people in Frank, Alberta. The proper depth of a bird bath is three to nine centimetres. Scientists have successfully crossed a pig with a teddy bear; the result is a teddy boar. Cook’s HMS Endeavour carried 94 people: 71 ship’s company, 12 marines and 11 civilians. From St. John’s to Victoria we have more than 1,700 YMCAs.  Since 1905, Vick’s VapoRub has been used to treat mosquito bites. 200 grams of kangaro...

Today in 1713, France ceded Acadia and Newfoundland to Britain. In continental Europe, robins are a delicacy. The first Women’s Lib organization was established in Toronto in 1967. Weasels whose coats turn white in the winter are called ermines. Parisians eat snails because they dislike fast food. Joan of Arc began hearing voices at the age of twelve. Today in 2008, the Supreme Court ruled the RCMP must serve New Brunswickers in both official languages. Happy Birthday! All racehorses age one year on January 1st. The name of a church in which a Bishop presides is a cathedral. Earthquake humour will crack you up. Anne Frank hid in the attic with her two cats, Tommy and Boche. Today in 1976, the Apple I went on sale.  Galileo calculated the height of the moon’s mountains, by measuring the shadows they cast. The weight of a GMC Sierra 1500 is 3.2 tonnes. My neighbour wrote a book about his cat; it's called Hiss and Tell. Mangrove tree...

Spiders do not have antennae.  We have 1.3 millionaires from sea to sea to sea.  There are seven types of tenors. Venezuelans have won six Miss Universe, five Miss World and six Miss Int'l crowns.   My next-door neighbour sings like a hinge. The Pillow Fight League was organized in T.O. in 2007. Shakespeare is credited as creator of the Knock Knock joke. Brazil is the second largest market for Chevrolet. In order to qualify for office a PM candidate must be 18 years of age on election day. Canada is the vichyssoise of nations: half cold, half French and hard to stir.  Today in 2010, the Vancouver Olympics ended; we snagged 14 gold—the most of any country. Rose soup recipes call for pears, broth and rose petals. Caller ID was introduced to the public in 1987. The first beret factory opened in 1810. If you saw my last phone bill from Bell Canada, you wouldn’t say talk is cheap.  We can choose among 1,305 Englis...

Today is All Hallow’s Eve. Onions are 97% water. Sponges do not have organs.  Today in 1952, the Stratford Shakespearean Festival was incorporated.  My neighbours dressed up as almonds for Hallowe’en—I always knew they were nuts. Had the Allies had to drop a third bomb on Japan in 1945, the intended target was Tokyo. There are three main branches of science. Forced to abdicate in 476, Romulus Augustulus was Rome’s last Caesar. Phobos and Deimos are the two moons that orbit Mars. The scariest Hallowe’en costume of all is to dress as a cellphone battery about to die. Americans spend $6 billion on Hallowe’en, the year's second most commercial holiday.  St. Matthew is the patron saint of accountants and bookkeepers. Using a slingshot in a Canadian National Park is illegal.  Oxygen is a pale blue colour in its liquid and solid states. Hallowe’en was once the most frightening day of the year—now it’s election night.  ...

Today, 1.2 billion people in India celebrate Independence Day. A newborn baby unicorn is called a sparkle or a shimmer. On this date in 1483, Sixtus IV consecrated the Sistine Chapel. 100 grams of popcorn contains 375 calories. Always be yourself—unless you are a unicorn—then, always be a unicorn. The Republic of Korea came into existence on this day in 1948. Unicorns can only be captured by virgins. The State of Goa is India’s smallest in size. 45% of words in the English language are derived from French. You know it’s going to be a bad day when your Rice Krispies won't snap at you. Whistling was once considered unladylike. 8 ½ hours ahead of UTC, North Koreans set their clocks back 30 minutes as Pyongyang Time was introduced today in 2015. Unicorns get a shout out eight times in the KJV of the Bible. Hope for a bright future but build a bomb shelter, anyway. Purple is the colour of a unicorn’s eyes. At USD$2.67 billion ...